I need to take care of myself and myself only as priority, I'm sick of my sacrifices not being appreciated by those in my life who only care about themselves, I've been here before and I didn't like it then, i fucking hate it now, maybe i allow it to happen, but No more, I Am forty fucking years old... it's time to do things for me and me alone... this substandard existence that only recently i have sat and seen for exactly what it is is no longer any fucking comfort for me, if it comes down to it, sometimes I'm better off alone than being taken advantage of, I can take care of myself and survive and have a half decent life but providing for other i don't need to isn't really part of the equation, when i think I'm being taken advantage of, or worse being taken for granted, that's a clue to leave and find something else... I'm no longer feeling that and when i am busting my ass to take care of myself and the important things in my life... being pressured to do more than that doesn't sit well with me.. I know exactly where at the end of the fucking day my priorities are, I wonder about others... but for now, I'm making one thing my priority, Myself.
Current Mood: Frustrated.
In medieval times, contrary to popular belief, most knights were bandits, mercenaries, lawless brigands, skinners, highwaymen, and thieves. The supposed chivalry of Charlemagne and Roland had as much to do with the majority of medieval knights as the historical Jesus with the temporal riches and hypocrisy of the Catholic Church, or any church for that matter. Generally accompanied by their immoral entourage or servants, priests, and whores, they went from tourney to tourney like a touring rock and roll band, sports team, or gang of South Sea pirates. Court to court, skirmish to skirmish, rape to rape. Fighting as the noble's substitution for work.
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