Wanting me to stay but telling me to push away all my freinds. That will fucking happen. over your petty jealousy.these are the people that kept me alive when my whole world fell apart. I may love you But this particular condition is a bridge too far. I will always choose those that were loyal to me. You fucked off for your own personal reasons and left me in the wilderness for two fucking decades. Just because outside reasons had me fucking forgive you, doesnt mean I have forgotten the scar you placed upon all our lives.. You dont deserve the right to choose my freinds I get to care for... and I would never sacrifice them just to be with you. I feel things deeply, but this time all I feel is the darkest taint of the usual betrayal. You dont get to dictate terms, neither of us won. Both of us lost the war. This is simply the aftermath, its barely even detente. We just stumble on to oblivion. I'm done fighting your battles and being miserable myself because of it. I cant si...
You think I want to escape from this? There is no escape from this! At the end of the day i know exactly where I stand, and i will always be here. But the moment is slowly ticking away to where it will be anything more than old emotions and affection. I know my net worth and who the fuck I am, there will be a change when the clock ticks fifty. I will always be there and care cuz of responsibilities. You will always be my family, the only one I will ever have. Thats a fact. But I cannot sit there and play these games constantly over the sands of time and all these years. You know what the fuck I want, all I have ever wanted, but if can't have it I will move on. Endgame as always. Everything or nothing. The rules are well defined. Nothing has ever changed. Its understood. The differnce is this time ive decided that there is a line in the sand and a fucking moment that everything will fucking end. Find yourself right with your illusions and jealousy or lose that part of me forever....