I am at peace and it’s going to take one hell of a person to change that. There’s only one person I want in my life but I am aware she prefers as villain and devil over her saviour. I’m good with that. If there has to be a bad guy in the story let it be me. Doesn’t mean the emotions aren’t still there. Even the devil has loved ones. It’s not there yet, but it’s close. But im still not letting my guard down as history has proven that it just takes one mood swing and everything changes. There was a moment once I cared about doing the right thing and being a good person. But now if you’d asked me if I would choose to be the angel or the demon in the equation, I’d choose demon without hesitation. Demons are honest. They wont hide behind lies of a pretty face. The biggest issue other than Trusting you is the fact I have to decide 25 years on if i want you in my life after all the damage has been done. I wake up every day wanting you to be my wife, and I go to s...
Sometimes I am reminded that all we truly are is a simple set of goodbyes. I’m trying to be more but right now we are just in that place we always get to. The In between something and nothing. While I’m good either way, the heart wants more and will always long for it. That’s why I try. That’s why I’m trying now. I don’t know where we stand. And I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. For some reason you want to be in my life tho. I just cant stand you just being an accessory to it. I can’t pretend to be something we are not. And you need to figure out what’s best for you, me in your life or not. It’s been a lifetime of bad decisions for both of us. I’m not sure I want to continue in that same path. It’s just all bad road. The key is getting away from it all I agree. The only problem is that we are at a crossroads and i don’t think either of know the next step. The only reality is that I want us both to be happy, and I think we are better off happier ...