You have no right to call upon and ask for protection and support when you involve yourself in drama, I’m not there and that’s you’re doing. Yet the fact that I will always be there for you weighs heavily on my mind. I will always take that stupid fucking call.
But early morning wake ups about you’re pathetic little dramas about other men are not something I truly need to deal with. Especially not this weekend, this is why there will likely never be another moment for us... because instead of holding or talking to the one that means the most to you, you deal with fuckin randoms and then call me to throw it in my face and I’m hardly awake and I don’t even understand.
I hate the fact that you will always use my as a protector but always from afar, you want all the benefits of what we were.
We aren’t that anymore. Maybe we are getting closer to it, maybe one misstep and I’m going back to living in a box... I don’t trust you and there are times when I want to give you my all and I can’t.
This isn’t what I signed on... and the way you behave has me fearing for my kid. He sees all the same actions I do. I will always be there but there are fucking days I don’t have to like it. Today is one of them.
I will always have you’re back even when you fucking destroyed me, the heart wants what it wants. But, One of needs to grow up, and clearly it’s no longer me.
Current Mood: Confused.
Current Music: The Quiet Room, Alice Cooper.
"I've seen knights in armour panic at the first hint of battle. And I've seen the lowliest unarmed squire pull a spear from his own body, to defend a dying horse. Nobility is not a birthright; it's defined by one's actions."
—Robin of Locksley
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