At the end of the day I’m standing alone in my crown of thorns and a castle full of ruins, I know that. I’ve always known that.
There will be no one at the end regardless of any sacrifices I have ever made.
The only legacies I will leave are the ones of those that stood adjacent to me and I didn’t affect there lives.
I have watched my worlds burn and I have risen from the ashes more times than I want to admit.
I’m still fucking here. I’m still standing. I’ve weaponized my tears because otherwise they would have broken me.
...and you call other men King? There’s only ever been one true King in you’re life. And only one true prince. And you damaged both relationships irrevocably.
Once I thought I had forgiven you, but I think the true reality is that I was just trying to justify the fact that I could forget you and all the damage that you had done...
I take no solace from the fact you’re own life is on fire due to you’re own actions and behaviours... it’s just an indication of the person you truly are and have always been.
Yet at my core I still love you and embrace you despite the destruction. Because I know how broken and flawed you are.
But I know I’m even more broken and flawed. But I’m fucking diamond. It may be a broken crown, and a giant piece of glass upon that cross that lies that crown of thorns.
But I’ve taken everything you and this cruel bitter world
Has ever thrown at me and I’m stronger for it. You exist amongst the weak, meanwhile I soar with the strong.
Have you ever asked yourself why I have a happy life and am always surrounded by my loved ones and my best freinds yet you travel you’re paths alone?
Because I don’t need anyone, but I embrace who is there. And I remember who treated me decently and who treated me like pawns and peons.
Im not miserable and I live like a fucking
King. But there are things missing.
But one of them is not regret. That’s the difference between us.
You regret a life not chosen. I have sadness about the life not chosen but I don’t regret the life I have or the choices I have made or have been forced to make.
I’m having fun and not
Miserable and I’m still young enough to write another chapter if I wanted to. I turned the gasoline you burned all of our bridges into a fine aged wine.
Yet I’d still watch both of our worlds burn happily. I’m happy. I’m never going to be miserable again.
What’s you’re excuse?
I have found peace in my life and with my people. But not with you, never with you. We are not at peace and we will never be. Wonder why that is. And it’s not one of my numerous flaws. It’s something you are or something you did.
I wonder why that is.
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