Skip to main content

The Chess Game VIII

In every man's heart there is a devil, but we do not know the man as bad until the devil is roused.

i am fucking fed up with being talked down to by people who arent even fucking listening, thats my money in fucking play that i had to fucking scrape upa and fucking borrow.... this is me and my sons life on the line and another long story bullshit about nothing is now confidential after the last few months being top secret and confideintial due to the culture of confideinetality in this fucking province... this is the end game for her.. i'm only willing to play ball for so fucking long.. he's been gone 6 years.. i am not under any fucking reason going to delay court anymore. fuck that shit... we go to trial. this is a game and this is just another way of her using pawns to not get to the fucking end game, well for this time i say too fucking late... i'm out of patience and it's not my life on the line.. it's my sons... that's all its about.. but this was always the plan to interrupt court, to force another stalemate in our lives... we know that this is exactly what it has always been,a stall tactic... another fucking game to delay it for another year or two.. that's her endgame.. thats always her endgame. make me the demon and ride out the storm till he's 18.

guess what bitch, I am the approaching storm, and i don't have four more years to wait... i don't have 3 weeks to wait..its time to end this... im prepared for whatever ends up happening.. win or lose i'll roll with the fucking concequenses but i want my fucking day in court.. something that has long been fucking denied... who really speaks for that child when you hide behind a broken and flawed system?? its all a game to you, thats all its been since day one when we met. you dont live in this fucking reality... youre a damaged person and you've damaged him as well and taken all that was good in me and taken it away... that's fine.. i needed the darkness, i needed the anger, i needed the touch of evil to defeat you, you can have all that was good in me, it goes to him, the best parts of me are in my child. but remeber, everything else, this man that you have made me, this monster you have created? i have no soul, and i will have no sympathy for you, no man or woman on this earthly plane will ever judge me... and in that moment when it's time to be judged.. im bringing ammunition, but i'll watch you squirm in that courtroom first, I am not fucking backing down not this time.. not ever. it's time for my fucking day in court... its time for this to end.. and its not about my voice that needs hearing.. it's his. its my sons.. the one good goddamn thing i have left in this life..you expected me to fold and go away, just like in 05 and 06..and 11 and i never fucking will. i fight for what i belive in, espically when its the only thing i have fucking left.

No More Stalemates. I'm Done.

Current Mood: Very Fucking Angry

Current Music: This Battle Chose Us, Anthrax


Life is a storm. One minute you will bathe under the sun and the next you will be shattered upon the rocks. That's when you shout, "Do your worst, for I will do mine!' and you will be remembered forever.

Understood man's capacity for horrors, and never quit. Saw the world's black underbelly, and never surrendered. Once a man has seen, he can never turn his back on it, Never pretend it doesn't exist. No matter who orders him to look the other way. We do not do this thing because it is permitted. We do it because we have to. We do it because we are compelled.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.
Post a Comment
Read more

Fall Of Cybertron III: Where’s Poochie.

It is very easy for me to fade away and just get bored of other people and politics when games are played. I’m not even fucking blinking when someone else who I’ve done things for, constantly for months with no rewards suddenly forgets I exist. That’s real easy for me to fucking deal with. Con politics, games, asshole people that don’t pay there Fuckin promises from day one? Don’t call my number.  I stepped away from this shit once on my own. I have no fucking problem doing it again. I feel used and betrayed, but for me it was a Tuesday. I suspect jealousy and politics but I also know when to stick a fork in something when it’s done. I’ve got no interest being around anyone that doesn’t want me involved in there little cliques. I mean this thing was fun but from day one it was political. I don’t need stress and drama in my life. I can hang up my Wizard robe and move the fuck on. I did a great job of it on my own anyways. I don’t look amateur hour like the rest of them. And I no lon...
Post a Comment
Read more

Serpent's Kiss.

I pass in and out of peoples lives. sometimes i wonder why they come back. sometimes i wonder if the issue is me. i do grand things and i back up my plans and words and maybe sometimes thats too much for some. but all i have ever asked from those that i love is honesty. i don't care if things fall apart. all i need is the truth.  I'm getting to the point i don't trust fucking anyone. and being betrayed by those that are at best fairweather fucking friends when im not exactly finacally fucking stable.  there are reasons i keep my circle small and those i truly trust even closer. it takes a lot to be a part of my life and and i am seriously considering withdrawing from some of my social activities again because it seems like the last couple years they just turn to shit and all i am doing is losing money. i have stopped caring about a lot of people in the past and it can be real fuckin easy for me to walk away from agian. id rather work on the relationships both old and new th...
Post a Comment
Read more