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Numb.....

I don't know right Now how to feel, somethings missing and all I feel is numb, all i have been used to for the last few days is my best freind beside me and now he's gone and it will be a little while before i see him agian, the bedrock that is our freindship is only stregthened by these experinces and it was nice to have things that i have become jaded and bored with, seen through another mans eyes, reexamining my own views and realizing the marvels that are out there in my own backyard that seem commonplace to me, they are wonders to others.. I am glad you have taught me that... I just wish that It could have been longer and that you never left.. I miss have my partner in crime to do dumb shit with.. I just feel so fucking Numb.. I cannot imagine how you have been feeling.. there are so many experinces and conversations i swear i could talk to you for days and learn so much from you, and the feeling is so mutual, and it's just this perfect thing.. this perfect freindship because in the end, all that matters is that you have stood beside me as my freind.. I wish you hadn't gone.. i want you to come back. I miss you already. The pictures and experinces we have had will last a lifetime and I cannot wait to make hundreds more.... I wish our responsibilities didn't chain us to the lives we currently lead but there will come a day of reckoning for both of us.. and while i have never regretted any of the paths i chose.. Not making the decision to abandon Canada for greener pastures across the pond.. Is something today, I deeply regretted.. If it wasn't for the one thing keeping me rooted, I would have been long gone a long time ago... vancouver, england.... somewhere... I'm finally allowing myself to feel agian and it feels like another peice of my soul has been ripped out chunk by boring chunk, because one of the true men in this world, one man who has always had my back, is gone... back home.. so very far away. i got so used to having you by my side.. and now you're not and I'm just Numb.

Current Mood: Numb.
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there....

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