Skip to main content

Arma-God Damn-Mother Fuckin'-Geddon


We are Not impressed. it seems that certian priorities are extremely fucked up. I cannot belive this shit and it seems i should be examining my options esp. career wise. i did not fight this fucking hard to get where i have gotten to have it made a mockery of by bad planning and business decisions. i am very frustrated and that is something that should not be. i work very hard and the existance of freetime is a joke. i need to go back to some of my originals writings and essays and find some balance within them.. i need to reexamine my ethics and beliefs and get back to a place i am comfortable instead of being dictated to by superiors who don't have a clue, i know the ministry guidelines a lot better than most, and i need to go back and read my opions and facts on them to get back to a place i feel fucking comfortable becuase right now i don't feel that way... and this is not a one burned out day this is a contuinal process.. and i am coping with it the only way i know how and that's with DEMON ALCOHOL... and i know it's unhealthy... but seeing how i can't breathe much less have any time to hang around my support circles it's the only option. sleep, work, slep at work, get bitched at, deal with issues, work, sleep. welcome to my life.. it sucks.. not as bad as it used but i am not impressed to be working a weekend i have my son and the first fucking thing I hear in the morning is fucking bullshit about cleaning when I have been doing it all morning and it is not part of my job description they need to fucking pay me better if they want molly maid at 7 am. as i said before... Priorities are skewed... but then agian.. i need to reexamine everything and make noise... i have a voice i fucking use it... this is the job i want but i've gotta get more agressive in more ways than one... but i am not going to sacrifice my morals, ethics and beliefs for the job.. i may love this job and in a way it's a dream job.. but i won't sacrifice everything else for a paycheque.. if i see something wrong i deal with it.

Current Mood: Frustrated. (i should not feel this way all the time after work, esp. in this feild.)

when all of your wishes are granted, many of your dreams will be destroyed..

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.
Post a Comment
Read more

The Laugh Track.

  I want you in my life. Don't ever fucking confuse that for needing you in my life. Those two things are mutually exclusive to each other. I'm fine with my life and it's not my freind's and my social life that I'm jealous of. We both made our choices. My life has always been an insane carnival. You were merely an extended chapter. But if you think I'm going to sit at home being sad and depressed and shutting down because your not in my life. Your delusional. Then agian we already know this. If my life is going to be a sad comedy then I'll make it a metal massacre. I'm not sitting around waiting for anyone. The least of all you.  I sacrificed enough time on the altar of what might have been. I'm just enjoying the time that we have left. This way if it go out, it's on my own terms. I always told you that my funeral pyre will be a blaze of glory.. I just never told you when.  Now I'm gonna live and have adventures. Remain jealous. You know how ...
Post a Comment
Read more

51.

Happy birthday.  Hope you are happy and enjoying yourself. I like that we are civil and communicating but i also think you need to take some introspective time and decide the next step. I want you to be happy whether or not I am a part of your life. And i am trying very hard to be. Today, this weekend. I just want to talk to you, hear you laugh..maybe even see you smile. Thats all i want. For you to enjoy your day and hear happy Birthday from me and my son. Thats all you need..to know you are loved. Happy Birthday Baby. You are always loved. No matter what. Unconditional.
Post a Comment
Read more