There are things in my life I don't like and It's time to start addressing some of them, ands eradicating them from my life, but for the moment some of those things I dislike are the things that keep me going every day, a man cannot live and eat and breathe on hate alone, i have taken a half step back from all of these conflicting and corrupting demons within me as well as taking a minute to look at what I have, what i have had, what I need and what's Important. I am well aware of where I stand in my life and it's Nowhere close to where i want to be, I should happy as hell right now and Instead I am am constantly given to anger and/or depressed. I know how to direct that sadness and anger into the right direction and/blow off steam with some of my entertainments or this toy bullshit, and I am making plans to enjoy myself with trusted friends, but there is always going to be something missing, so my choices are use everything about me, both the light and the darkness to man up and fucking fight or fall into the abyss and become the demon I always have been. it would be very easy to become him once again, and No One would miss me. I was always happier being a ghost busking on a street corner in Toronto, Niagara or Windsor. No one knew me, and that was the way I liked it. i was a wraith someone you passed by in the night. it was easier. I got away with a lot of shit that this adult responsible me would never be capable of. I feared no one and nothing, still Do... and I spoke my mind without biting a forked tongue. then like now I never backed downfrom a fight but back then I was a lot more physical in what i wanted, then I got fuckin tamed.
In fact Directed as a weapon, the Old me might even be an Improvement.
Current Mood: Angry.
Current Music: Nothing's Free, Alice Cooper
Animals don't behave like men,' he said. 'If they have to fight, they fight; and if they have to kill they kill. But they don't sit down and set their wits to work to devise ways of spoiling other creatures' lives and hurting them. They have dignity and animality.
I learned the bad guys are not always bad, the good guys are not always good, and to quote Captain Barbossa, the parameters are like rules, mostly guidelines. And that it takes a little bit of bad boy to fight the evil in the world.
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