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Fuck Easter II

My love for you May be unconditional but you're presence in my life is not. I have no problem living my life without you and him, that was you're decision in 2005. And that was you're decision in 2011, eleven years ago. While for some strange reason you want me in orbit now, I'm starting to understand you're all or nothing approach... that's not feasible unless you're willing to do the same for me, you know what's waiting. I might stay single because all I want is you, but I'm not going to give you the satisfaction of knowing that.


I have spent eighteen years in the wilderness without you, and while I do fucking think that we would we be happiest together. And I've made a chess move to affect that, you are still scared and/or clearly not ready so maybe I'll be patient and wait until you decide that you are ready. But I know there is an element of abuse in you're treatment and behaviour of me and that won't be tolerated. 


You can't keep destroying me and my life and the happiness I have without you and keep blaming me for destroying our lives. That was you're choice not mine. I was always here. I'm always going to be here.  I love you both but I can't deal with you're unjustified jealousy and you're mental drama.... the ghosts in you're head do not rattle about in mine. I am not To blame for you're actions.


But I always remember what you took away... eleven years... and somehow I still love you both.


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