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I Know You're Fucking Someone Else.



Eventually I'm just gonna move out and on, I can't keep living at a survival pace and taking care of someone else when there is no appreciation for my sacrifices and its just expected I will provide. This has been ongoing for far too fucking long. The next step might have to be alone. Without anything or anyone. As usual. 

The door is closing on a lot of things in my life and it's is becoming more and more obvious there is no looking back. Theres nothing there to look back for. 

I'm functional because I choose to be. Tying up loose ends and fulfilling my responsibilities. But its very fucking obvious that my life is standing still. I am on cruise control and nothing ever fuckin changes. As long as status quo is maintained no one cares. Id rather people be afraid than complacent. I cannot continue to pretend that I'm going to remain in this moment forever. Its time for a change. Maybe it was time for an end. But I am unsure of anyone else in my fucking life either....

But as always, deaf ears.. no one is listening. Its the usual Coma. No best freind to drop a dime, he's too concerned about his own survival. Something I am responsible for half the time. Its understood. But its pushing its fucking luck when all I feel is the weight of the world crushing in on me and there is no fucking daylight.... and there has not been in many many days...

I am Done. There is no going back now. I burn bridges with gasoline while still standing on them. I don't look back. Not for you. Not for anyone. I am simply done.

I dont need anyone or anything. I never have. I will never beg anyone for table scraps of attenion either. I will simply move on and forget that you exist.

Completely. 

I am no one's back up plan or second choice. I never have been. If I feel disposable in your life consider me gone. Period. 

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