Skip to main content

Finish Him!!!

Fake friends are like shadows: always near you at your brightest moments, but nowhere to be seen at your darkest hour
True friends are like stars, you don't always see them but they are always there.

Going to one of my oldest freinds once agian to bring his son something for his birthday last Friday was pretty fucking cool. The gift harkened back to me and his dad's old days haunting the downtown arcades, things that are one of my few good memories growing up, the fact that new freinds were made and me and a very old freind had time to chill watching them was cool. It sucks there is still a missing part of the equation, but that will come soon enough but for now, this was a little price of normality the way things should be, there's no question even tho I am a hard man to have as a good freind that this man has my back unconditionally and has since we were kids. It was pretty fucking awesome to just hang out and have a kids night out and spend time there celebrating his birthday, it's been a long time since I've felt this normal and the more things I do, and the closer I get to having him home, little things won't make me forget my own, but it's nice once in a while to have others that I care about around to share some of the positive elements and people in my life. It was a pretty cool experince. It will happen agian. Pretty cool that I was the bad influence when we were kids and I probaly got him into more shit than he needed to be in with who we chilled with, and now he still keeps me on the straight and narrow and gives me perspective in life, esp during some of my darker moments. It's good to have a freind like that, I have a few like that but he's the only one that's been that way for a quarter century. This last weekend minus one very important part has been one of the few times in the last while I have both been full of inner turmoil and been at peace, I'll take as much of the happy times as I can get. Those are the things important to me.

Current Mood: Happy.
All my friends are fighters. I've never met a man before who avoids the fight because he knows he'll win.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.
Post a Comment
Read more

Franco Un-American.

I hate everyone. I just pretend I don’t because I’m chasing this false inner peace, thats being constantly eroded by outsiders. I am happy, I was at peace. But I do see my country and more importantly my city for what it’s for and I’m getting angry again. Maybe I do need to be angry. Maybe I do need to rebel. Maybe I do need to speak out despite the fact that it can be used against me and hurt those I love. Nothing fucking new to me. This apathy has gotten me nowhere, this trying to be at peace was working but maybe I need to be angry, maybe I need to rail agianst the things that once were right have now went wrong. This isn’t a world I want my child growing up in, and he’s grown. But this isn’t the world I promised him. This is something else.  This city wants to pick a fight with me? Cool, I know what busybody bitch it is. Don’t think I will tolerate any threats to those that I care for or myself. You want to fucking start a war? Maybe it’s time for me to be angry again.
Post a Comment
Read more

Someone Like You.

I know there are aspects of me, my personality and my life that you still like. It’s why you had my child and no one else’s. But I don’t colour within the lines enough for you to settle down with. That’s been acknowledged for two fucking decades. He’s an adult. I don’t need to answer to anyone anymore in my life. I wasted years fighting you when I should have been fixing you. But those moments are over.  All of our moments are over.  I don’t even need to be angry. I just need to be. You and I are toxic. I’m better off without you in my life. It’s a little less toxic when I’m the only one on the boat. Only the captain goes down with the ship. I’ve always known i would die alone anyhow. No family, no friend’s, no real accomplishments to my life. I wrote that line almost 30 years ago. Self fulfilling prophecy. At least that way when I implode no one gets hurts.  I was a fool to think otherwise. I’ve left too much damage in my path. I just want to be happy and at peace whatev...
Post a Comment
Read more