Skip to main content

We Are Done.

We are done. You don't get to hurt me anymore. You are blocked and I have fucking moved on. You don't get to keep destroying my life. You don't exsist anymore. Things you have said cannot be unsaid.  I'm not living with you're insanity anymore. You ruined me because of you're mental health issues and need for attenion...that's not even the ultimate betrayal. That comes later.

...when our son realizes what you taken from him.

But for now... I am fucking done. You're right we are fucking nothing... But I won't be around for you're next fucking nostalgia trip. Far fucking from it. I have goals, I have things left to accomplish.. it's fine to get back to them.

I will never be happy with you and there is someone else. So any further communication is useless. Part of me feels really good that I stood my ground with you no matter what it fucking cost me.. and telling you that we were done and to fuck off and that you were gone and blocked makes me feel like a million bucks. This was never on your terms.. you were never in control. That's you're fucking problem not mine. I don't need to be in control. I just need to be me.

You're always going to make me the villian in some demented tragic love story between us... I'm not fucking interested.. if you need or want me to be the villian, so fucking be it... I don't care... I like being the bad guy... I'm fine playing the villian. They are always cooler anyways. There was a time I cared for you deeply.... There was a time where I hated you... There was even a time when I thought I could forgive... Now there is nothing.

I just pity you.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Laugh Track.

  I want you in my life. Don't ever fucking confuse that for needing you in my life. Those two things are mutually exclusive to each other. I'm fine with my life and it's not my freind's and my social life that I'm jealous of. We both made our choices. My life has always been an insane carnival. You were merely an extended chapter. But if you think I'm going to sit at home being sad and depressed and shutting down because your not in my life. Your delusional. Then agian we already know this. If my life is going to be a sad comedy then I'll make it a metal massacre. I'm not sitting around waiting for anyone. The least of all you.  I sacrificed enough time on the altar of what might have been. I'm just enjoying the time that we have left. This way if it go out, it's on my own terms. I always told you that my funeral pyre will be a blaze of glory.. I just never told you when.  Now I'm gonna live and have adventures. Remain jealous. You know how ...

The Trees.

  I am really bothered by someone hurting my tree. I’m not sure the next step but that’s a living thing. I know that there is no healing when our things are still affected negatively by people. I’m not sure what the next step is but I know this is part and parcel of the entire thing and that we can’t heal when people hurt the things we care about.  I don’t have much but I do have a legacy to protect and there is a place where my son needs to feel safe, and I don’t think it will ever be that house agian. But once it was home, there are good memories there. There was love.  Part of that is the peace that was our tree. I’m sick of people damaging the things I love.  The world needs to be better and less selfish. I need peace in mine and her lives. Even if we are separate in our lives. She needs the peace and quiet I have in my life. Even more than I do.  And only one of us has it. 

Return To The Abyss.

If anyone thinks they can take advantage of me and the people I care about, they are sadly mistaken. I walk away from people I love because of their bullshit. Someone who is merely there in my life? Yeah, I’m fucking out. I don’t need emotional vampires that suck me dry in my life. I will walk away from anything and everything at this point. I no longer give a damn about anything other than myself when it comes to your opinion.  This decision and many others have been a long fucking time coming and to be honest I’m better off doing my own thing alone and solo. Because it’s better off for all involved. There’s still a temper and there is still the old me hidden underneath this attempt at seeking peace. I’m not a nice guy, I’ve never claimed to be a nice guy. And I’m not keeping my fucking mouth shut.  No one fucking uses me, Period. And thats all I’ve felt I’ve been over the last few years. By a number of people in my professional life and my personal life. So maybe at this mom...