Other Wars II

I have always fought wars in my life. These battles didn’t start and begin in 2000. They started when I was a fucking child. And all I ever gained in those battles for me and my family members was a little bit of gained ground every time. But we stood our ground and never asked for anything.

For someone on the outside looking in to judge my current circumstances and judging someone inducing care about for his choices is hypocritical as all shit, I’m trying to maintain normality and no thank you I don’t need. Or want your help. But thank you for exposing your true colours which I have long suspected that I wouldn’t be able to call on you if something happened to him again.  I’ve known that for two years. For Fucks sake even my wife isn’t that cold. 

This is why I face things alone and don’t ask anyone I don’t completely trust for anything. Because it will eventually be thrown in my face or someone else’s close to me. I’ve learned that nothing in this world come without a price or a judgement call.

Newsflash. I can do that too, especially from someone who has just looked in from the outside and never really asked how the mental and physical health of her so called loved one is.

I have my own battles to fight that have been put on hold the last two years because I felt this was a bigger one. I don’t like feeling guilty or him feeling guilty because of his choices. Even if some of them are shitty. That’s why I’m trying to teach him how to live agian. The same way I fucking had to for different reasons.

But he was there for me when I fell. No way I’d ever abandon him when he needed me either.

But glad to know there’s one less person to involve in any plan of long term care if I need to abandon that responsibility for my own family’s health concerns. 

This is why he’s part of my family actually. The exact reason because me and mine that I hold

Won’t abandon him. 

Here’s a few rocks, I’ve seen you’re pretty little life. Including your recent vacation and you’re gigantic cottage in cottage country.  Meanwhile I’m helping him maintain his home and keep food in his belly and have a few luxuries.

Cast the first stone.

Until you sacrifice half as much as I have these past two years as I have you have no right judging him, we do things because we want to and we budget accordingly. We don’t need help. ESP a ripple across the river in terms of what  things have costed.