Skip to main content

A Grave Mistake



I’m not going to be the one to fucking save you from the drama in your life. I’m busy trying to finding peace in my own life and you disturb that. I am willing to listen but the rules are apparently written. You may hate that I have the control and the power back. But there is a fucking reason it exists and why I have that power over you. That’s our agenda.  You’re move.


I’m never gonna back down one iota. I never have. You know this better than anyone. We may be broken. But I’m used to being broken, I just made a choice for myself and my mental health. The rest is up to you. But Tick tock time is running out, and I have you to a timeline. 


I’ve spent the last two decade’s wanting to fix this for reasons that have nothing to do with my emotions. But I’m done being the one, I was always happy being your fucking villain. A honest enemy is just as good as a lover. At least pretend to be one or the other. 


I hate being being in limbo with you. I’m going to force and answer and I’ll just be fine and move away and find someone else to be if you say no. Have no doubt about that. I know who I am and who you are. And it doesn’t Matter how at peace I am, I know you aren’t. And that’s what I’m waiting on. I don’t want to complicate you, but that moment comes soon where I draw a line in the sand and then you decide.


Or I am fucking done.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.

Franco Un-American.

I hate everyone. I just pretend I don’t because I’m chasing this false inner peace, thats being constantly eroded by outsiders. I am happy, I was at peace. But I do see my country and more importantly my city for what it’s for and I’m getting angry again. Maybe I do need to be angry. Maybe I do need to rebel. Maybe I do need to speak out despite the fact that it can be used against me and hurt those I love. Nothing fucking new to me. This apathy has gotten me nowhere, this trying to be at peace was working but maybe I need to be angry, maybe I need to rail agianst the things that once were right have now went wrong. This isn’t a world I want my child growing up in, and he’s grown. But this isn’t the world I promised him. This is something else.  This city wants to pick a fight with me? Cool, I know what busybody bitch it is. Don’t think I will tolerate any threats to those that I care for or myself. You want to fucking start a war? Maybe it’s time for me to be angry again.

Someone Like You.

I know there are aspects of me, my personality and my life that you still like. It’s why you had my child and no one else’s. But I don’t colour within the lines enough for you to settle down with. That’s been acknowledged for two fucking decades. He’s an adult. I don’t need to answer to anyone anymore in my life. I wasted years fighting you when I should have been fixing you. But those moments are over.  All of our moments are over.  I don’t even need to be angry. I just need to be. You and I are toxic. I’m better off without you in my life. It’s a little less toxic when I’m the only one on the boat. Only the captain goes down with the ship. I’ve always known i would die alone anyhow. No family, no friend’s, no real accomplishments to my life. I wrote that line almost 30 years ago. Self fulfilling prophecy. At least that way when I implode no one gets hurts.  I was a fool to think otherwise. I’ve left too much damage in my path. I just want to be happy and at peace whatev...