You’re Favourite Victim.

I’m done pissing on dumpster fires. It was much easier to just hate you. Whatever the hell this is, it’s not what I’m willing to entertain for the rest of my life. I have other things to do and achieve in my life. I made a promise I kept it, but I’m done waiting for you and I’m done giving a damn. I’m not going to have you put the same knives into my back over and over and over agian. We are too old for this shit.

I am not a plaything to be used emotionally over and over agian. I will just walk the fuck away and not even think about it. You’ll be the one missing me when I’m gone. I won’t even blink and I won’t give a fuck.

You seem to think I am the only priority in your fucking life and that nothing else matters. As you are well aware you are very very very fucking wrong. Just because I make you a fucking priority doesn’t mean you are the only one in my life. Far the fuck from.

I have options and things I need to attend to and I won’t be playing this game in a decade. I shouldn’t be playing this game now.

I don’t need to be a prisoner in my own head wondering where things might have went. But as long as you are in my life that’s exactly where things are. I liked it better when you were no longer a part of me and I had moved fucking past you. I’m trying to relearn that skill because I hate who I am now and I hate the part of myself that is still in love with you. I know it’s in there somewhere but on the surface level I know that emotion isn’t truly returned or you wouldn’t hurt me the way you do.

All I am is someone to always catch you when you fall. One day you’ll hit rock bottom and all you will hit is concrete because I won’t be there.

Comments

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.

Bad Man.

I am not a good man, I tell people straight out that I’m not a good person. I know I’m toxic. But I embrace being the villain and being the bad guy. Being feared is better than being loved because at least that way you respect me. When it comes to someone I care about and have a responsibility to, I will always choose them over others fucking bullshit and drama. This isn’t a choice. This is my life. Period. I live it every damn day. I’m not Making any other choices. I will always choose those that I care about over people that are merely in orbit in my life and if you give me a reason to fucking doubt you? I will give u a reason to fucking fear me. I’m just fed up, my world doesn’t need complications. My peace and my piece of mind doesn’t need complications. I have enough of those I struggle against in my personal life. This is the end game, and the end times. I deserve to be fucking happy. No one is getting in the fucking way of that. Period.

The Dying False King.

I am a ghost and a spectre in a lot of peoples lives that I have touched. Some I shouldn’t be, and some I have willingly walked away for my own mental health. I’m starting to get to that point with many things in my life agian. I thought it would be easier to live a simple life and just have fun but I think it’s harder than when I worked my face off as a father. At least then my enemies didn’t pretend to be my freinds and the world wasn’t falling apart slowly. Just my world. I think I prefer whatever that was then compared to what the world is now. I have my own life and adventures and I don’t need anyone that doesn’t want or need to be in my life. I have fun with what I do and don’t let negative sources affect my life. If you’re gonna drag me down, I’ll be gone. That’s how it works. You’re not going to disturb my fucking peace. That’s what the metal shows are for. That is anger’s release. Plus to have fun.

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