I’m done pissing on dumpster fires. It was much easier to just hate you. Whatever the hell this is, it’s not what I’m willing to entertain for the rest of my life. I have other things to do and achieve in my life. I made a promise I kept it, but I’m done waiting for you and I’m done giving a damn. I’m not going to have you put the same knives into my back over and over and over agian. We are too old for this shit.
I am not a plaything to be used emotionally over and over agian. I will just walk the fuck away and not even think about it. You’ll be the one missing me when I’m gone. I won’t even blink and I won’t give a fuck.
You seem to think I am the only priority in your fucking life and that nothing else matters. As you are well aware you are very very very fucking wrong. Just because I make you a fucking priority doesn’t mean you are the only one in my life. Far the fuck from.
I have options and things I need to attend to and I won’t be playing this game in a decade. I shouldn’t be playing this game now.
I don’t need to be a prisoner in my own head wondering where things might have went. But as long as you are in my life that’s exactly where things are. I liked it better when you were no longer a part of me and I had moved fucking past you. I’m trying to relearn that skill because I hate who I am now and I hate the part of myself that is still in love with you. I know it’s in there somewhere but on the surface level I know that emotion isn’t truly returned or you wouldn’t hurt me the way you do.
All I am is someone to always catch you when you fall. One day you’ll hit rock bottom and all you will hit is concrete because I won’t be there.
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