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Bottom of the Barrel


If i hadn't suspected that you had a recreational drug use problem before you're new asshole boyfreind confirms my suspions, how far under the bar did you had to search to find him, rule one.) if your a fucking douchebag do not try to be my fucking freind, esp. when you hang out with her and have more access to my son than i do, two.) what the fuck are you smoking when you are dating a shirtless dick that's about 55 years old and looks like a cross between robert plant and cocaine dealer, I'm assuming this is exactly how you want to present yourself as a role model for our son, that's ok he knows who the better parent is anyways, karma's a bitch so i'm sorry about your foot, but you should really not be drinking and doing whatever else you were doing with the new cocaine addled boyfreind, I mean you must have really scraped the bottom of the barrel with him, of course he probaly feeds your habit, Wonder what would happen if you were asked to take a piss test these days...

With your bitch slap rappin'
And your cocaine tongue
You get nuthin' done


....and your continuing mindgames towards my son are even more disturbing, I mean telling him you love me a little bit and telling him he might have a real little brother or sister (which means the last time i checked both of his biological parents...) and then there's the whole you're gonna get married to this new idiot? what do you plan to get married the minute some new asshole spreads your fucking legs? stop being a whore and grow up, he's almost 7 for christ's sakes, he's getting wise to your games.. at least he knows when i have him 100% of my time and attention is devoted to him and his likes and desires....

Current Mood: Pissed off, Depressed, Angry
Having children makes you no more a parent than having a piano makes you a pianist

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The Laugh Track.

  I want you in my life. Don't ever fucking confuse that for needing you in my life. Those two things are mutually exclusive to each other. I'm fine with my life and it's not my freind's and my social life that I'm jealous of. We both made our choices. My life has always been an insane carnival. You were merely an extended chapter. But if you think I'm going to sit at home being sad and depressed and shutting down because your not in my life. Your delusional. Then agian we already know this. If my life is going to be a sad comedy then I'll make it a metal massacre. I'm not sitting around waiting for anyone. The least of all you.  I sacrificed enough time on the altar of what might have been. I'm just enjoying the time that we have left. This way if it go out, it's on my own terms. I always told you that my funeral pyre will be a blaze of glory.. I just never told you when.  Now I'm gonna live and have adventures. Remain jealous. You know how ...

51.

Happy birthday.  Hope you are happy and enjoying yourself. I like that we are civil and communicating but i also think you need to take some introspective time and decide the next step. I want you to be happy whether or not I am a part of your life. And i am trying very hard to be. Today, this weekend. I just want to talk to you, hear you laugh..maybe even see you smile. Thats all i want. For you to enjoy your day and hear happy Birthday from me and my son. Thats all you need..to know you are loved. Happy Birthday Baby. You are always loved. No matter what. Unconditional.

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.