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Funeral for a Freak.

Today is not a good day to be on my fucking bad side... I'm an in an angry mood and want to rip someones fucking head off.. all the pent up frustrations of the last few months seems to be coming to a head and the fact that i could just kick a door in and kick the shit out of her instead of dealing with things the right way is playing heavily on my mind...I could do that, but I'm better than her... i don't seek to destroy her life the way she has completely decimated mine.. over and over and over again...I wonder how sad her own life is, Right now between the sleepless nights and the fact i am having serious pains in my side that could be an ulcer or my gall bladder and i am too focused on dealing with this to go to the doctor to deal with the psychical pain,I'm so fucking sick of sacrificing everything and ending up with nothing, I'm sick of the world allowing things like this to happen, I'm sick of being in pain... this is one of the days where i am tempted to take the Cobain leather jacket, fold it up at her door, leave my message and go to the falls and jump... but that would accomplish nothing, and would only serve as a grand exit... and I'm not leaving this world.... not because of anything she's done or will do... I'm stronger than her and I will prove it... it's too bad the fact is it shouldn't be who can endure, because i will always be the one who endures.. I will always be a lone wolf without ties and without anyone like you in my life, worst mistake i ever made was allowing you back into my life, I will see this threw to the end and I will see you exposed but there is no malice, and the only anger is from what you have taken from me, I will restore my career, my reputation and my relationship with him, you can only knock me down, as long as I still keep getting up no matter my condition, you have not fucking beaten me.

Current Mood: Determined, Tired.
Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

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