My whole life I have had only two responses, fight or flee. And I usually don't know how to do anything but fight....
But this time... I think there's something worth fighting for.... I just hope it doesn't cost me everything... Because I have nothing left.
All I know is that there is a lot less darkness right now inside myself... I'd like to hold onto that if I can. I'd like to hold onto them for as long as it lasts.
I am going to fight for this and I am going to fight for them. It's not going to cost me anything to be the bad guy and the villain this time and it will take all the negative energy off of them. I'm good, I can handle it. I'll take it all on me for as long as I have to.
I wish I was there to have handled it more over the years.i think you and him needed that. Every step along the way.
I'm sick of being strong and fighting for the wrong reasons. But when I know it's the right reason I'm never going to stop fighting.
I don't back down from anyone. I'll lose the battle if I have to but I'll do it on my feet. I will always fight. I'm too stubborn to back down.
And when it's truly worth fighting for... Like my son... Like how you perceive my truest purest love, the fact I am percieving the educational system is treating him the same way he did me isn't making me happy. Those darkest moments that I had going away are now rocket fucking fuel for me. You don't fuck with my blood and my family and they are certainly are that.
Look the fuck out.
Babe, being angry at you was never like this.. this is a whole different level.
Current Mood: Ballistic.
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