I dont know what the next option is. However I do know that its nice to have options in my life that make me happy. I'm going to live in the moment and see what the world brings me. No expectations but no world changing movements that are under appreciated either. If this is the path im set on so be it... if it changes im good with that. Both paths lead to struggle But both paths also lead to happiness. And I'm willing to change or be status quo.
Im happy in my life and I have good people around. No drama. I think it may continue on that path.
I live my life in moments both good abd bad. That's what I have because I dont know how many I have left.
The last few moments have been an eye opener. That should say it all. I'm going to choose happiness at the end. But it'll be on my terms as it always is. No one elses. No one has ever been there to save me... why should I be classified as savior. I'd rather be with someone who makes me happy without drama. All looking back ever gives me is drama. Im better off alone.
I dont know where im going. But I know im having fun on this adventure to get there. Sometimes I feel like a prisoner in those life with my responsibilities but its nice to make time with someone who respects and appreciates what's happening in my life rather than someone who only appreciates the illusion of a fading fucking reminder of who I used to be. That's guy is gone. All of what I used to be is gone. Im someone else. That's all I am.
I'll take the chance of nothingness over despair that's lasted decades if that is what it's going to fucking down to.
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