Skip to main content

Fear, Himself.


one wonders about himself and the cracks between himself when the weeaknesses are starting to show in a personal life and becoming uncontrollable... when someone is very right about something but i refuse to acknowledge it, that's not healthy. of course i have a destiny and winds of change will take me where they will. one day maybe soon a return to niagara is possible at the current moment i kinda of like it here, warts, demons and issues included. maybe i should take a step back and look at my actions as i can see my fears and my anger and all of my demons affect someone i care about, but it's real easy to run away when you see something you can't control or understand. i have been resitant to change by other than my own hand for years, the same goes for control, the minute someone tries to define me i define myself by being exactly what they think i am, and being very predictable.

Current Mood: you mean other than the hangover?

Comments

Unknown said…
i don't need your redemption
i don't want you to deceive me
and I don't need your forgiveness
i only want you to believe me

do you see me here
i'm standing naked
do you see me here
i'm on my knees

now all my life i've been wandering
looking for teachers with the keys
nothing found still searching
for sound...
underground

now let me tell you about a story
it's about a man consumed with vice
he's theosophical in nature
and hedonistic in disguise

and all his life he's been wandering
looking for teachers with the keys
nothing found still searching for sound
underground...

i don't need your redemption
i don't want you to deceive me
and I don't need your forgiveness
i only want you to believe me

and all my life i've been wandering
looking for teachers with the keys
nothing found still searching
for sound...
underground

and all my life i've been wandering
looking for teachers with the keys
nothing found still searching
for sound...
underground

underground

underground
1:29 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.
Post a Comment
Read more

Bad Man.

I am not a good man, I tell people straight out that I’m not a good person. I know I’m toxic. But I embrace being the villain and being the bad guy. Being feared is better than being loved because at least that way you respect me. When it comes to someone I care about and have a responsibility to, I will always choose them over others fucking bullshit and drama. This isn’t a choice. This is my life. Period. I live it every damn day. I’m not Making any other choices. I will always choose those that I care about over people that are merely in orbit in my life and if you give me a reason to fucking doubt you? I will give u a reason to fucking fear me.  I’m just fed up, my world doesn’t need complications. My peace and my piece of mind doesn’t need complications. I have enough of those I struggle against in my personal life. This is the end game, and the end times. I deserve to be fucking happy. No one is getting in the fucking way of that. Period. 
Post a Comment
Read more

The Dying False King.

I am a ghost and a spectre in a lot of peoples lives that I have touched. Some I shouldn’t be, and some I have willingly walked away for my own mental health. I’m starting to get to that point with many things in my life agian. I thought it would be easier to live a simple life and just have fun but I think it’s harder than when I worked my face off as a father. At least then my enemies didn’t pretend to be my freinds and the world wasn’t falling apart slowly. Just my world.  I think I prefer whatever that was then compared to what the world is now. I have my own life and adventures and I don’t need anyone that doesn’t want or need to be in my life. I have fun with what I do and don’t let negative sources affect my life. If you’re gonna drag me down, I’ll be gone. That’s how it works.  You’re not going to disturb my fucking peace. That’s what the metal shows are for. That is anger’s release. Plus to have fun. 
Post a Comment
Read more