TERRITORIAL PISSINGS

Public school shouldn't be a place for politics> i think i can understand now why the ex has so many problems with the people she works with and why she is so miserable, it is very clear to me that certian students, I.E. the kids not from lower class and broken homes that can afford to pay for programming get priority, and no one really cares about the others as long as they are kept quiet and out of peoples hair... there are some really deserving kids in my group but because of the actions of the others rightly or wrongly the are all painted with the same brush and my being chewed out by a prinicple is just bullshit when i haven't done anything wrong except speak to someone he asked me to speak to... of course i am now aware she's a shit disturber and i will no longer speak to her.. if she has an issue or the other person playing politics in the program that's paid for they can go to the principal because i am no longer enganging them in conversation so that my words can be used agianst me politically... it's about the kids not about petty diffrences and program conflicts.

Current Mood: Angry.
If a small thing has the power to make you angry, does that not indicate something about your size?

Comments

The Laugh Track.

I want you in my life. Don't ever fucking confuse that for needing you in my life. Those two things are mutually exclusive to each other. I'm fine with my life and it's not my freind's and my social life that I'm jealous of. We both made our choices. My life has always been an insane carnival. You were merely an extended chapter. But if you think I'm going to sit at home being sad and depressed and shutting down because your not in my life. Your delusional. Then agian we already know this. If my life is going to be a sad comedy then I'll make it a metal massacre. I'm not sitting around waiting for anyone. The least of all you. I sacrificed enough time on the altar of what might have been. I'm just enjoying the time that we have left. This way if it go out, it's on my own terms. I always told you that my funeral pyre will be a blaze of glory.. I just never told you when. Now I'm gonna live and have adventures. Remain jealous. You know how ...

The Trees.

I am really bothered by someone hurting my tree. I’m not sure the next step but that’s a living thing. I know that there is no healing when our things are still affected negatively by people. I’m not sure what the next step is but I know this is part and parcel of the entire thing and that we can’t heal when people hurt the things we care about. I don’t have much but I do have a legacy to protect and there is a place where my son needs to feel safe, and I don’t think it will ever be that house agian. But once it was home, there are good memories there. There was love. Part of that is the peace that was our tree. I’m sick of people damaging the things I love. The world needs to be better and less selfish. I need peace in mine and her lives. Even if we are separate in our lives. She needs the peace and quiet I have in my life. Even more than I do. And only one of us has it.

Father and Son.

I dont know the next step. I don't claim to. I just know I'm working to rebuild a relationship that has been fractured for many years. That includes both of you. I am here. I will always be here, I have always been here that will never change This weekend was epic and it felt right. I don't know what will happen but i do know that I am at peace with being civil and polite with your mom. It was nice to have a little adventure as a family. It felt right. It what was missing in our lives. Thank you.

Nikk's Blog of doom!!!

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