Cybertron: The End.

...And one of the three endings has happened... i am operating at a fucking deficit after dealing with 3 different assholes this business is connected to, all supposed friends... I'm fucking done... it's all going into a storage locker and if i am to continue in any form i will take a days pay cash up front or I'm completely done... I'm not working my ass off to see money spent and me actually owing money after a 2000$ weekend, it's not worth it anymore... i have fractured emotions with friends and family, many of which have saved my ass more than once, the warning signs have been there for months, i should have gotten out of this game the first time it majorly fucked up my personal life, I'm not good with warning signs, but i nearly walked out this morning because i was going to to have a mental breakdown for the first time in my life, when things and people start affecting my mental health and relationships with my family... it's time to be done... i stuck around for the non exsistant payoff and at least accomplished what i needed to do past that, fuck it, I'm done. An End.

Current Mood: Exhausted
Current Music: Eminem, Survial

Wait, let me remind you of what got me this far, picture me quitting
Now draw a circle around it and put a line through it, slut

Comments

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.

Bad Man.

I am not a good man, I tell people straight out that I’m not a good person. I know I’m toxic. But I embrace being the villain and being the bad guy. Being feared is better than being loved because at least that way you respect me. When it comes to someone I care about and have a responsibility to, I will always choose them over others fucking bullshit and drama. This isn’t a choice. This is my life. Period. I live it every damn day. I’m not Making any other choices. I will always choose those that I care about over people that are merely in orbit in my life and if you give me a reason to fucking doubt you? I will give u a reason to fucking fear me. I’m just fed up, my world doesn’t need complications. My peace and my piece of mind doesn’t need complications. I have enough of those I struggle against in my personal life. This is the end game, and the end times. I deserve to be fucking happy. No one is getting in the fucking way of that. Period.

The Dying False King.

I am a ghost and a spectre in a lot of peoples lives that I have touched. Some I shouldn’t be, and some I have willingly walked away for my own mental health. I’m starting to get to that point with many things in my life agian. I thought it would be easier to live a simple life and just have fun but I think it’s harder than when I worked my face off as a father. At least then my enemies didn’t pretend to be my freinds and the world wasn’t falling apart slowly. Just my world. I think I prefer whatever that was then compared to what the world is now. I have my own life and adventures and I don’t need anyone that doesn’t want or need to be in my life. I have fun with what I do and don’t let negative sources affect my life. If you’re gonna drag me down, I’ll be gone. That’s how it works. You’re not going to disturb my fucking peace. That’s what the metal shows are for. That is anger’s release. Plus to have fun.

Nikk's Blog of doom!!!

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