The War XV: War Games II

3 plus years and only when I make a proactive move to get records at this point do you do anything to attempt to prevent that? this is a chess game and I am always 2 moves ahead, but this is also a war and It is very apparent you are the losing end of the battle... for me it's never been about winning or losing but doing what is right and what is in the best interests of our child... of course to you and your own selfish ends it's only about you... it has only ever been about you... when and if i get the records it destroys your credibility that part is understood.. but you do know what happens when you unleash a dragon, esp. a dragon fighting for his cub, you will feel the fire... it's not about who is right or wrong anymore but it is about the truth and the more games you play and the more you seek to hide these things the weaker you become... This has never been anything but a game to you, but it is his life in the balance and i will fight you with every once of strength till i fall, and I don't know how to fall, even at my weakest moment's I am still stronger than you, this isn't about my anger, this isn't about revenge, it's not even about me and you anymore.. it never has been, it is about doing the right thing for my son, i wish you would take that into account but you're anger and hate blinds you, This would be so much easier for me if i could muster up half the hate and anger you have for me, they would make effective weapons, bu even as much as i do have hate in my heart and anger towards you, it is a microcosm of yours.. i could never hate you as much as you hate me, you good or bad are the mother of my child and that is important, even if we hate each other, but i would never wish to destroy you.. It isn't about you... even tho you probably think it is.

Current Mood: Determined.
After the war I was going to make up for lost time. But the time I spent away, it's still lost. No matter what I do, it stays lost.

For my love, I will wade through an ocean of blood, even if it destroys me.

Until they feel what we feel, they will never fully understand the own hell they caused.

Comments

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.

Fall Of Cybertron III: Where’s Poochie.

It is very easy for me to fade away and just get bored of other people and politics when games are played. I’m not even fucking blinking when someone else who I’ve done things for, constantly for months with no rewards suddenly forgets I exist. That’s real easy for me to fucking deal with. Con politics, games, asshole people that don’t pay there Fuckin promises from day one? Don’t call my number. I stepped away from this shit once on my own. I have no fucking problem doing it again. I feel used and betrayed, but for me it was a Tuesday. I suspect jealousy and politics but I also know when to stick a fork in something when it’s done. I’ve got no interest being around anyone that doesn’t want me involved in there little cliques. I mean this thing was fun but from day one it was political. I don’t need stress and drama in my life. I can hang up my Wizard robe and move the fuck on. I did a great job of it on my own anyways. I don’t look amateur hour like the rest of them. And I no longer

Fuel Injected Suicide Machine.

Pissing me off is never a good fucking option. I have a life and I don’t need to make fucking sacrifices for anyone if I choose not to. I’m getting real fed up with simply being expected to do and arrange things so someone else can have a fucking escape. This is starting to become a fucking pattern in my life. Some I choose to do for, but others, when I’m starting to notice a fucking pattern? I’m gone. I will always be gone. The fact I have yet to step foot in England when I have a secondary place to stay should speak volumes in terms of this freindship and how it’s no longer even. I’m sick of things only being halfway when I’m trying with certain fucking people and I can bail and close ranks and not give a flying fuck about anyone anymore when I’m not being treated with respect esp. given to mine and my brothers financial situation. I don’t mind making sacrifices but I’m still going to make sure that my main fucking priorities are taken care of. I’m not going to pretend to keep th

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