Are we still playing this game? are the chess pieces still in play? this is becoming the never ending story, you using nothing against me and hiding behind an iron curtain of court and trying to stall and stall and play games... if stalling the final end game is your plan as predicted you are doing an admirable job... i just want this to end, it has been ten years to the day since i found out i was a father and i have spent seven of them fighting... i tire of the endless battle, it's too one sided and it's not about what's in his best interest at all, it is only about one thing anymore and that is one person's selfishness... if you were half the fucking woman you thought you were you'd take that child to get some counseling and attempt to let him have a relationship with his father, but no it's more important to you to tie our panties up in court for years over petty things, there's a reason i never bothered with records until i needed them, i knew this would be the eventual fucking outcome and everything i am fucking moving towards would be destroyed, All it is now is a waiting game with you providing mind games... i may have to stand tall as i have no other choice, i don't know how to die, I don't know how to fall down and fail.. but it get's harder every day to do so, everyone seems so distant in my life and i wonder if all of the sacrifices i have made are worth it, I know that they are but every time it seems like i am anywhere close to the goal games are played to continue the eventual stalemate... here's a newsflash bitch, i play to win, i don't play for stalemate, i don't play for detente, this is a war, I play to win, I stand, fight and will not fall till this over, I play until this is checkmate. it's not about me or you in my mind, it never has been.. it's about him, But in your mind it's not about him, it's about me and you, it's about your anger and hate, I'll be gladly greeting you at the gates of hell to see your soul burn... I can't be you, as dark as i have ever been, i would never place our child in the place that you have to get even with me... If you want to settle a score, if you want destroy me.. you had your chance you lost... it's too bad that I don't see the need to destroy you, because that would affect and hurt him... because I could.. and it would be too fucking easy. Remember that.
Current Mood: Angry, Depressed, Determined.
There are occasions when it pays better to fight and be beaten than not to fight at all.
I am haunted by the clear knowledge that, in the end, evil always triumphs.
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