The forces of desire that sway man's mind are the forces that will eventually destroy him, while a singular love that roots his heart makes him invincible
It's frustrating going thru the last of this stuff trying to get rid of and drain every dollar from, it is a toy graveyard and while I do occasionally find the odd interesting item it's very frustrating that most of what I have left is a mountain of fucking junk that will probaly end up on the curb, once upon a time I had a bunch of interesting shit in these bins and now it's just another worse less endeavour reminding me how much has been fucking sacrificed of my time. It's frustrating because I know once upon a time I had a lot of interesting things and now I'm moving forward and beyond these things but it still fucking sucks that none of these cool things he ever got to see, that's on his mother not me, a handful will be kept, enough for a kick ass couple of shelves but the fact remains that it's frustrating that every time I do inventory and choose what to get rid of, it's more that he will never have, material things are useless but knowing that birthdays and Christmases the last few years that have been missed were never a problem, it's just frustrating that I could have given him everything, anything from this shit, and she has denied him that. This is the worse part of the fucking year for me but the pain is lessened for me this year, but the pain will never go away. Not until this is over.
Current Mood: Sad
Current Music: Within Temptation - Whole World is Watching
Whatever doesn't destroy you, makes you stronger. Hardships have a way of toughening us, if they don't kill us.
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