Skip to main content

The War LII

You can lose a lot of soldiers but still win the game.

As Expected, Today went no where. the only thing gained was we now understand each other, all the cards are on the table.... and you've played you're hand... I have not played all of mine... but i do know this.. I have nothing to fear from any of your so called surprises, there's nothing left for you to make me fear.... you are as transparent now as you are even going to be and we know the lay of the land... you will lose. I didn't need to hear you lying, but the cadence in your voice not only showed that you were afraid of the process but you are afraid of me.. so afraid that you are willing to lie to accomplish your own selfish wants and needs....The only thing that has changed in your character is that you know that you are losing and have changed tactics to appear more sympathetic to accomplish your own twisted desires. that story will unravel in court, 5 fucking years and you can't keep your story straight, so at the end of the game why not invent a new one.... the only thing that bother's me is the fact you have continued to lay this at his feet rather then your own. typical, why accept responsibility for anything, I would never expect that from you.. But you will have to realize one day he will realize the truth and every shred, every document will be provided to him for him to make his own decision. I don't want to be you on that day of judgement, the only one at this point that is ever really going to matter.. it's never been about you and I, it's always been about him, I've said before and I'll say it again, If he hates me Fine.... but I'm not the only one he's going to grow up to hate.. and the blame for that, will always lie on you, Not me. The only thing i want him to know is that i never, ever gave up fighting for him, even when things were at their darkest. The rest he will likely discover for himself.

Current Mood: Determined.

My demons are fate’s way of telling me I won’t escape unscathed.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.
Post a Comment
Read more

Franco Un-American.

I hate everyone. I just pretend I don’t because I’m chasing this false inner peace, thats being constantly eroded by outsiders. I am happy, I was at peace. But I do see my country and more importantly my city for what it’s for and I’m getting angry again. Maybe I do need to be angry. Maybe I do need to rebel. Maybe I do need to speak out despite the fact that it can be used against me and hurt those I love. Nothing fucking new to me. This apathy has gotten me nowhere, this trying to be at peace was working but maybe I need to be angry, maybe I need to rail agianst the things that once were right have now went wrong. This isn’t a world I want my child growing up in, and he’s grown. But this isn’t the world I promised him. This is something else.  This city wants to pick a fight with me? Cool, I know what busybody bitch it is. Don’t think I will tolerate any threats to those that I care for or myself. You want to fucking start a war? Maybe it’s time for me to be angry again.
Post a Comment
Read more

Someone Like You.

I know there are aspects of me, my personality and my life that you still like. It’s why you had my child and no one else’s. But I don’t colour within the lines enough for you to settle down with. That’s been acknowledged for two fucking decades. He’s an adult. I don’t need to answer to anyone anymore in my life. I wasted years fighting you when I should have been fixing you. But those moments are over.  All of our moments are over.  I don’t even need to be angry. I just need to be. You and I are toxic. I’m better off without you in my life. It’s a little less toxic when I’m the only one on the boat. Only the captain goes down with the ship. I’ve always known i would die alone anyhow. No family, no friend’s, no real accomplishments to my life. I wrote that line almost 30 years ago. Self fulfilling prophecy. At least that way when I implode no one gets hurts.  I was a fool to think otherwise. I’ve left too much damage in my path. I just want to be happy and at peace whatev...
Post a Comment
Read more