Skip to main content

Skeletons II

Can a soul suffer from exhaustion? or is it just the fire and the bright light of said soul descending into blackness? you know what made my night last night? having my landlord sit there and tell me that i am a good father and that this will pass, that meant a lot... what doesn't kill me only makes me stronger....I wish i could still believe that. all these people telling me what a good person I am yet it only takes one other person believing otherwise due to someone Else's lies to destroy me... because the truth is never as strong as a lie.. the only difference is the lie will one day be exposed.... maybe if i rattle a few chains in front of a judge that day will be sooner than later, after all it's not like i have a fucking exact date for your brother, his uncle doing a line a cocaine right in front of my as my little boy slept a few feet away, and the fact you are a fucking regular at mikado's can't help either....go ahead, require a piss test from me as well... you'll only find THC and hops.. i don't like hard drugs and i despise the fact that you have been constantly over the years been around people that do them, but it's obvious to me at this late stage with your wonderful sabotage of my entire life... it's not a job you've taken away it's my career, i can't wait for you to come to court crying poverty with no lawyer and saying i need to fucking pay child support, when you are the direct cause of the fact I no longer have a job.... i can't wait to see what a judge has to say about that, this is obviously your end game because after stripping me down to the bone there's not much left for you to do... either i cower and flee and lose everything....(not happening, not this lifetime.), Or i fight you with every dying breath.... I'll be taking door number two bob barker. 1000 posts of this blog and how many have been a release over the last six years about you and how sad you've made me feel in this life? I'm not the one with something missing inside that tries to replace it with many men in her bed and the cocaine in her head, one day you will be exposed for who you are.. and one day he will understand the games you played.... but much like me he will not understand it either.... the only thing i can understand is that you are selfish and materialistic and the only thing you look upon men is for what they can give you and treat anyone you love as a possession until they are no longer useful to you, then they are cast aside for the newer shinier version, c'mon when i was 28 you dated guys that were mid 20's and you were 30, what does that say about you? other than the fact you need to keep your goddamn legs closed? I don't care anymore, when you've taken everything there's only one thing that matters.. and he is the only thing you can only try to take away from me... and i will go down to my grave before you succeed. I'm not the only one with secrets, the only difference is all of mine have been exposed and peppered with your lies and half truths, let's see what happens when we open up your Pandora's box....

Current Mood: Sad.
Current Music: Foreclosure of a Dream, Megadeth.
There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.

Fall Of Cybertron III: Where’s Poochie.

It is very easy for me to fade away and just get bored of other people and politics when games are played. I’m not even fucking blinking when someone else who I’ve done things for, constantly for months with no rewards suddenly forgets I exist. That’s real easy for me to fucking deal with. Con politics, games, asshole people that don’t pay there Fuckin promises from day one? Don’t call my number.  I stepped away from this shit once on my own. I have no fucking problem doing it again. I feel used and betrayed, but for me it was a Tuesday. I suspect jealousy and politics but I also know when to stick a fork in something when it’s done. I’ve got no interest being around anyone that doesn’t want me involved in there little cliques. I mean this thing was fun but from day one it was political. I don’t need stress and drama in my life. I can hang up my Wizard robe and move the fuck on. I did a great job of it on my own anyways. I don’t look amateur hour like the rest of them. And I no longer

Fuel Injected Suicide Machine.

Pissing me off is never a good fucking option. I have a life and I don’t need to make fucking sacrifices for anyone if I choose not to.  I’m getting real fed up with simply being expected to do and arrange things so someone else can have a fucking escape. This is starting to become a fucking pattern in my life. Some I choose to do for, but others, when I’m starting to notice a fucking pattern? I’m gone. I will always be gone.  The fact I have yet to step foot in England when I have a secondary place to stay should speak volumes in terms of this freindship and how it’s no longer even.  I’m sick of things only being halfway when I’m trying with certain fucking people and I can bail and close ranks and not give a flying fuck about anyone anymore when I’m not being treated with respect esp. given to mine and my brothers financial situation. I don’t mind making sacrifices but I’m still going to make sure that my main fucking priorities are taken care of.  I’m not going to pretend to keep th