Skip to main content

The Speed Of Pain.

I shouldn't be fucking sitting here hurting as much as I am, my heart and soul lay exposed and destroyed and everything that was fucking good about me is slowly dying, It won't die alone, when I am succumbing to the more evil parts of my nature, the anger and the voilence I will fucking channel them into a white hot laser of pain, if you are going to cause this kind of pain to me, I will do the same to you, and i promise you it will never ever fucking stop....I will destroy your life as you have destroyed mine... It fucking hurts so bad to even think about him and not have him hear with me, all because of your lies.. and the fact that you have coached him to say something that never happened, with or without him at my side He is my entire life and the only thing that matters.. that won't ever change... not because of your jealousy, your need for control or your lies.. I'm his father I am never going anywhere, no matter the cost and no matter how much it fucking hurts.

Current Mood: Sad.
Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.

But just remember when you think you're free
The crack inside your fucking heart is me

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.

Fall Of Cybertron III: Where’s Poochie.

It is very easy for me to fade away and just get bored of other people and politics when games are played. I’m not even fucking blinking when someone else who I’ve done things for, constantly for months with no rewards suddenly forgets I exist. That’s real easy for me to fucking deal with. Con politics, games, asshole people that don’t pay there Fuckin promises from day one? Don’t call my number.  I stepped away from this shit once on my own. I have no fucking problem doing it again. I feel used and betrayed, but for me it was a Tuesday. I suspect jealousy and politics but I also know when to stick a fork in something when it’s done. I’ve got no interest being around anyone that doesn’t want me involved in there little cliques. I mean this thing was fun but from day one it was political. I don’t need stress and drama in my life. I can hang up my Wizard robe and move the fuck on. I did a great job of it on my own anyways. I don’t look amateur hour like the rest of them. And I no lon...

Serpent's Kiss.

I pass in and out of peoples lives. sometimes i wonder why they come back. sometimes i wonder if the issue is me. i do grand things and i back up my plans and words and maybe sometimes thats too much for some. but all i have ever asked from those that i love is honesty. i don't care if things fall apart. all i need is the truth.  I'm getting to the point i don't trust fucking anyone. and being betrayed by those that are at best fairweather fucking friends when im not exactly finacally fucking stable.  there are reasons i keep my circle small and those i truly trust even closer. it takes a lot to be a part of my life and and i am seriously considering withdrawing from some of my social activities again because it seems like the last couple years they just turn to shit and all i am doing is losing money. i have stopped caring about a lot of people in the past and it can be real fuckin easy for me to walk away from agian. id rather work on the relationships both old and new th...