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Cowgirl in the Sand.





Baby my life doesn't reach to you

And if you want love so

Unconditional and real

You gotta ride that black horse baby


Through the depths of hell that I've been

Follow me away yeah

I will be the same

Strongest one to name


I don’t sweat you anymore… the simple fact I can walk by all of our homes and feel nothing anymore but nostalgic for a life that never really was, I can live with that. I appreciate that we are civil enough to exchange pleasantries but the reality is I’m not part of your life and you’re not a part of mine. That’s the status quo and there’s nothing wrong with it. I’m not falling down the rabbit hole with no resolution Alice. 


But the fact I could offer coffee today is a consideration, I am glad I asked you. Our story isn’t over yet. However we both have other priorities and all I have left to give you is my word. But you have to fix you first same as I had to for myself before we fix each other. You’re not there yet. Maybe one day. But I don’t need you hurting and broken. Some things I can fix some I can’t. History will just repeat.  You need to love yourself first before you can love me. I know there is love and affection but right now you just need to know I’ll be there. 


That’s where I’m standing. You know what’s next. But you have too meet me there not halfway and not with half truths. 


It’s unconditional, but I remeber everything. That’s my curse. Forgiven will never mean completely Forgotten. As much as I love you and as much as I want to love you and have the little bit of what’s left as a family. We aren’t there yet. And just like Courtney said, my life doesn’t reach to you. Just my heart. You’ll always have that.

You are my family. It doesn’t matter where we stand between us. We will always be that. You gave me my child. I and no other man will always be his father even in your eyes. I’ll be here when wanted or needed. But that tie will never go away and you have acknowledged that. I’m just still trying to make us whole, but I need you whole First. I love you always. Unconditional. I’ll be here. Always. 


My life doesn’t reach to you tho. As much as i want it to to. Black Horse time Baby. Real soon. 

Happy Easter. 



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