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Wait and Bleed

 


There are reasons i stand my ground and I don't back down from this. not from you, not from anyone in your life. I'm always going to be there. whether you or i like it or not, this is the sword i sacrifice myself on. 


The ultimate reality is that you need me more in your life than i need you in mine. and its a flawed sense of responsibility that keeps me coming around and dealing with all of your shit. i walked away 5 years ago to protect you and him, why the fuck are you still in orbit? its been almost 20 years since it ended. 


This is our last moment, wherever it goes from here, It will end. there has to be an ending, this thing cannot remain open ended. we need to finish the story, we need to finish the chess game. we have been at stalemate long enough. 


There are moments, but I planned this one a long time. And there’s always an excuse or something happens and leaves it the way it always is, unresolved. 


I walked away once to protect you, at this point I’m considering walking away a second time to protect my mental health. 


I have a good life, and good things... I don’t need anyone in my life that doesn’t want to be there. I am busy having epic adventures with my family and friends... that’s all I need. We all know what’s missing, but this is my retirement. I have enough responsibilities I’ll fulfill but this is me enjoying my life and Doing all the things I sacrificed in my twenties and thirties to be something else. That jobs done now. 




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