Skip to main content

Future Endevored?


Can't say I am happy at the way things turned out at the kiwanis program but I can't say I care either, obviously someone needed to be a sacrfical lamb and if it's going to keep the program there i'd rather quit then have them force me out because of stupidity and politics, spoke to my boss there about my concerns and the lack of respect for the program and I made a decision with him because i don't see the point of being somewhere I'm not wanted and it is affecting my health, my real full time job that i should be giving 100% to esp. when it's pissing me off and my life, the fact i was sacrificing friday nights with my son agian to work ten extra hours a week made the decision easy... he comes first.. before my carreer, before my goals, before Money before anything.... Helps i just got one of his major Xmas gifts he has asked for and a few bucks in my pocket by going to the local video game store and trading in old games we don't use for new hardware... that's cool. plus it has a camera and he wants to be able to take peektures... i wonder if i can upload them, but yeah, every dark spot leads to brigtness... hopefully my replacement doesn't deal with the same nonsense i had to.. and if he does my ex boss will recoginze the issues inherinet with the school staff there and there stupid politics... i've worked in a school before and had a teacher for a wife and i've never dealt with people as snarky and stuck up.... and my ex wife is pretty stuck up... but she's never went after a program for unpriviliged kids before.... my veiw on the teachers there is way low and reflects my opinion of the board as well.. there is a very good chance if i get hired on by any school board it won't be in hamilton.. of course it's been over two years in hamilton at this point... maybe i should start looking for another place to move in my nomadic lifestyle.. let's see what the future holds for my real job.... the frustrations and lack of support there are getting to me but then agian, it's nice to see sometimes it's just a matter of being able to look and see what is done after the fact that's important and i left work pissed yesterday but by the end of the day i was happy with what my co-workers and management had done to support me, this is why even when pissed off i bite my toungue and call it a day and if something needs to be said afterwords i do but usually i just let the pissed feeling go, maybe write about it here but then let it go and get on with my life.... I feel things intensily but acting upon them in the moment isn't always the best plan of action.

Current Mood: Determined.
All hail the American night!
What was that? I don't know Sounds like guns ...thunder.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.
Post a Comment
Read more

Respite on the Spitalfeilds.

I get to hurt, that’s my curse. I feel everything. And it never goes away. It doesn’t matter if it’s peace of strife. I always miss him. He’s always there buried not so deep inside. Along side that in my heart lies hope. But right now, the price is simply too high to have him in my life. I’m not good with authority or conditions.  And attempting controlling me has very negative conquences. So yeah, I’ll be here waiting. I should not hurt this much. Or be this sad. But it’s a fucking pain that never goes away except when it is replaced by anger. And I’m trying to fight that emotion off because bad things happen when I’m angry. And thats my secret Cap, I’m always angry. It’s what controls the hulk inside me from taking out an entire city block.  I deserved better. This wasn’t the life I was promised. This is for sure not the life I promised my son. That was taken away from me. I’m not to blame. But I’ll be damned if suffers like an adult the way I had to. I will always be here b...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Sinner.

I make no Bones that I’m a bad person, and I’m someone who has made mistakes. I take pride in being the bad guy, the villain and most of all a willing sinner. I will take full responsibility for all the things I have done. It’s the one thing I didn’t do I was convicted on. But that was my choice, when I make the gates of St. Peter or the gates of hell I can be judged. After all I have a throne waiting. I hold no illusions as to where I’m headed. The thing is people like you will join me there. I’ll see you on the seventh layer reserved for betrayers. The sad part is that if you remained a fucking ghost I would not have had an issue with you. But you had to make it fucking personal. Father Time has a long memory, and I don’t forget anything. You have some serious skeletons rattling in your closet and I can destroy you. I’m already dead, I’ve already been killed. One shot, Boom. Children’s aid won. Nothing you or anyone else can do, can hurt me. You can only hurt those I care about. And ...
Post a Comment
Read more