Queen of the Reich VII

.. And we are moving forward but somehow still in reverse, nothing like going up In the court and watching her say all the nice things and fully expect her to do nothing, of course that's why you have to be ready to move a few moves ahead in a chess game and have all your bases covered, while I am angry that only a little movement was achieved today she has show her hand of cards and the little advantage she thinks that she has is whittling away and will eventually destroy her, I'm just getting sick of the game and of the battle... I grow weary and it is almost like she enjoys it... soon I will have the information in hand to prove her half truths and misconceptions, and it might be time to bring a third hand into play, something to give me another advantage... there is only so long you can hide and after 2 years I am fucking sick of it.... to hear that it might be six months or longer, and we all know that their will be stall tactics....I'm not sure how much longer I can stand strong.. I'm not the Evil one here...I'm not the one destroying Lives here...at the end of our journey I'm not going to be the one to be Judged.. all of that, and the fact that you have destroyed a life that is not my own, My own is Inconsequential, but His life.. that's an entirely different story altogether... and that's completely on you.

Current Mood: Angry.
The further a society drifts from truth, the more it will hate those that speak it.

Comments

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.

The Remedy

I am reminded when I need someone how truly alone I am in this world. Because for as much as I am the constant and the shoulder to cry on. The same respect isn’t accorded to me, obviously. It hasn’t been in years. This is why I have never and will never need you. I don’t need anyone. Especially when I am fucking hurting over a lost freind. I hurt, I get to do that. I’m fine with that. I process and move on. I spend a couple days where I block out the world and keep going but I’m fine. I don’t accord anyone I don’t trust or respect the time of day. It’s not about who it is. I’ll willing burn a bridge im fucking standing on if it means I take you with me if I see you as my enemy. I’m on a quest for peace, anything that gets in the way of that or causes turmoil in my life can get the fuck out of my way or become ash, because I will go the fuck thru you. Affect my responsibilities in my life, I will accord the same respect you do to them, I don’t mind being a blunt instrum...

The Threat.

I an not a nice person. I am not polite or nice. I am scary and intimidating and I draw power from that fact. You fuck with the people I love and hurt them, I’m going to damage you in kind. I want people afraid of me. It means I’m respected. It means you’re intimidated. I would rather be horrifying damaged and leave with nothing if it gives me the power and the freedom to protect my friend’s and family. Keep in mind a man with nothing to lose once had everything slip thru his fingers. And I have no fucking problem being a threat, to you, to my enemies, to society. You name it. I simply don’t care. The best defence has always been to confront and attack whatever the source of the problem. It hasn’t always brought me victory but at some point it’s brought me peace knowing that I’ve never backed down or done anything to hurt anyone. Just responded to what has happened to me and the ones I love. You don’t want to be my enemy. It’s a bad place to be. And once you are marked as su...

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