Welcome to Hell II.

I may have fucking demons inside my Head, but right now there is only one battle I need to fucking fight..I can deal with the demons later.. it's time for someone else to feel the fires of Hell and the hate and the pain that has been inflicted upon me for far too fucking long, all other issues are immaterial it's time for battle it's time for fucking war...My soul may be forfeit but there is still an innocent part of it residing within and without me... it's time to fight for him, and Him alone... there is nothing else that matters all this external bullshit in my life are a result of my choices and others choices, some of them have been poor... but I need to ignore that and move forward and fight... it's all I have left.. some days it's the only thing i have left to keep me going... So I have to use it, the anger and the rage and the Fuel, It is often bettert than sitting at home depressed and pretending I can't do anything about my fate.. if you know anything about me, you know I say fuck you to fate and continue on doing my own thing until I'm gone... I'm thinking it's about that time once agian to be gone.. but just like everything else I do in my life.. I can and will exit on my own terms, Always... and not before you feel the fire at your back.. You and I may be Damned... He isn't. Welcome to Hell Bitch, I've been here for two plus years, time you felt some of it.

Current Mood: Angry.
Current Music: Welcome to hell, Eminem Ft Royce da 59

How much reverence has a noble man for his enemies!--and such reverence is a bridge to love.--For he desires his enemy for himself, as his mark of distinction; he can endure no other enemy than one in whom there is nothing to despise and very much to honor! In contrast to this, picture "the enemy" as the man of ressentiment conceives him--and here precisely is his deed, his creation: he has conceived "the evil enemy," "the Evil One," and this in fact is his basic concept, from which he then evolves, as an afterthought and pendant, a "good one"--himself!

Comments

Cowabunga.

Back to the job search i go... not really anything to do right now but play turtles smash up and watch tv so i decided to wander downtown and look for a job. I am feeling really good at the moment and trying to ride this positive feeling as long as it lasts and not let anything get me down. Current Mood: Positive. Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.

Respite on the Spitalfeilds.

I get to hurt, that’s my curse. I feel everything. And it never goes away. It doesn’t matter if it’s peace of strife. I always miss him. He’s always there buried not so deep inside. Along side that in my heart lies hope. But right now, the price is simply too high to have him in my life. I’m not good with authority or conditions. And attempting controlling me has very negative conquences. So yeah, I’ll be here waiting. I should not hurt this much. Or be this sad. But it’s a fucking pain that never goes away except when it is replaced by anger. And I’m trying to fight that emotion off because bad things happen when I’m angry. And thats my secret Cap, I’m always angry. It’s what controls the hulk inside me from taking out an entire city block. I deserved better. This wasn’t the life I was promised. This is for sure not the life I promised my son. That was taken away from me. I’m not to blame. But I’ll be damned if suffers like an adult the way I had to. I will always be here b...

The Sinner.

I make no Bones that I’m a bad person, and I’m someone who has made mistakes. I take pride in being the bad guy, the villain and most of all a willing sinner. I will take full responsibility for all the things I have done. It’s the one thing I didn’t do I was convicted on. But that was my choice, when I make the gates of St. Peter or the gates of hell I can be judged. After all I have a throne waiting. I hold no illusions as to where I’m headed. The thing is people like you will join me there. I’ll see you on the seventh layer reserved for betrayers. The sad part is that if you remained a fucking ghost I would not have had an issue with you. But you had to make it fucking personal. Father Time has a long memory, and I don’t forget anything. You have some serious skeletons rattling in your closet and I can destroy you. I’m already dead, I’ve already been killed. One shot, Boom. Children’s aid won. Nothing you or anyone else can do, can hurt me. You can only hurt those I care about. And ...

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