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Regeneration....

It is time Of another New start after another year of hell, But As always i deal with the fire and flames and become a stronger man because of it.. I know exactly who i am and where I am going in this life, the last little while i was distracted by someone else's selfishness and my need to have stability... too bad the truth is when dealing with unstable people who I myself are one of.. having anyone else around like that In any capacity ends up being like pouring fire on gasoline...I understand my world far too well, as soon as the issues started to become problematic i should have seen clearer and Gotten the fuck out instead of trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.. I have had to make sacrifices this past year and I have been taken advantage of, But no more... it's time for the next step, it's time to be full speed ahead... I don't use phoenix imagery in my writing because it's a cliche, I use it because i can't tell you how many times in my life my rebirths have been forged in flame and the destruction of everything I am or was...so many fucking times I have been destroyed, yet I stand here, Stronger, angrier, More bitter... But I am still standing here, Dancing and Embracing the flame... it brighten's the darkness and keeps me warm if nothing else...fire can destroy, but if you can withstand the flames you can control it. it's time for the next step. Alone, Without Fake friends claiming to be by my side. I have my Own wars to fight, there is no fucking reason for me to be involved in anyone else's only to have them turn on me when it's inconvenient, I've played that game my entire life where once someone else's use or need for me is used up, i am left behind and washed away, there's a reason i don't keep ties... I don't see the point, only the one's the truly matter are the ones i need the ones that rallied around me this week with no real reason of their own to do are the ones i respect, everyone else, Gone, I don't give a fucking damn about, this world Is not the easiest to live in, But it's the only one I got and I would rather have people standing my side in the fire and flames than the people i don't need that aren't there when the fire is building... I am starting to become like I was before... A lot harder and Angrier, When i was Young I hated the world and with good reason, thing's like fatherhood and education possibly dulled me, made me lose my edge, but on the underside, the darker path i choose not to always acknowledge that exists, there still Lies a fucking darkness... A darker path I could have and Can still choose, I have nothing to lose, trying to do the right thing has only Earned me Hell, what's the point in not burning in damnation?

Current Mood: Anger still, But Determination.
Current Music:Marilyn Manson No Reflection

Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armour yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.

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